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Never make the bed by yourself

How many things are you doing by yourself that you shouldn’t be?

Here’s a simple example. If you can help it, don’t make your bed by yourself. Some things are worth getting help with. Putting up Christmas lights is another one. Adding one person can make it go five times faster.

What do you do by yourself that, if you were willing to ask for help, you could do faster and better?

I’m looking for more of those things in my life, now that the bed is made.

The hardest part of goals

Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash

No goal is true until it is achieved. Every goal is a wish.

The choice you have in the next few days is whether you’re willing to lie to yourself until your lie becomes true. Are you willing to wish something were true enough to write it down?

The first step towards achieving your goals is to have the audacity to ignore your skepticism and write something down that isn’t yet true.

That’s brave. That’s the important first step. Without it you’ll never reach your goal.

For me, the hardest part of reaching goals is being brave enough to say what I want.


I was wrong. I need to rest.

Photo by Fabrice Villard on Unsplash

Never trust anyone who can’t admit they made a mistake.

I’m going to admit a mistake. I thought I should write on this site every day. I was wrong. Then I realized that in my life I’ve created a rhythm. Really I’m obeying a natural rhythm. It’s called resting.

Every natural thing requires rest in order to grow. It’s a law of nature. So in order to stay healthy and keep growing, I need to rest.

If you’re looking for a great book on this topic check out Wayne Muller’s book called Sabbath. He includes a wide range of religious traditions, practical thought and scientific evidence on why rest isn’t just a commandment, it’s also a great thing for anyone who wants to have a great life.

So I won’t be writing on this site on Sundays. Yes, I could schedule a post in advance but I like to write them each day. So this will be my last Sunday post.

I hope you liked it and I hope you had a restful Sunday. If you didn’t get Wayne’s book. It’s worth your time and money.


Why You Haven’t Done That Yet

Photo by Lukas Blazek on Unsplash

NOTE: I have not figured this out. I am figuring this out. 

How much do you have left to do? What incomplete or yet to be started tasks are nagging at you? 

If you don’t possess a God-given productivity gift then do yourself a favor. Never write down a task to be done without a time to do the task.

Tasks without times (deadlines) are regrets waiting to happen. 

Tasks without deadlines are regrets waiting to happen.

Do you start each day by writing down your future regrets? That’s what most to-do lists become. They’re seedlings of regret that are nurtured by our inability to say when we’re going to do the task.

So when you write down a task put it on your calendar.

If It’s Not On Your Calendar Let It Go

If it’s not on your calendar release yourself from the expectation that it’s going to be done anytime soon because it isn’t. 

We make time for the things that matter so if a task matters give it a time.

This works for lazy, undisciplined people and hyper-focused diligent people. That’s what some disciplined people told me.

What to do with should

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I should do a lot of things. So should you. 

But we do what we must. 

If I let the things that I must do go undone, the consequences eventually show up.

Should vs. Must

  • I should be more patient with my kids.
  • I must pay my mortgage.

  • I should exercise.
  • I must get out of bed every day.

  • I should write more often.
  • I must feed my kids.

  • I should have more in savings.
  • I must pay taxes.

What’s on your should and must list?

We all have our own list of should and musts. 

Should is a trap. Must is where change happens. 

Should is a guilt trip, and it’s optional. 

Make your shoulds, musts. 

  • I must be more patient with my kids.
  • I must exercise.
  • I must write more often.
  • I must have more in savings.

This is how I am changing my life, by turning shoulds into musts. 

When I do this I experience less regret, more traction, more clarity, and fewer negative consequences.

I should have done that a long time ago.

h/t to a friend who sent me a Tony Robbins audio that presented this idea. I don’t remember who the friend was, sorry.